Friday, June 24, 2005

Respect the Cock

In light of the frightening developments in Tom Cruise’s personality including the latest – an attack on Matt Lauer on the Today Show this morning - DoG thinks it’s best to provide some background into Scientology.

Operation Clambake - The Fight Against the Church of Scientology on the Net.

No matter what you think you know about Scientology, it’s WAY crazier than that. Imagine the craziest thing you can think of. Got it? Now imagine that you got Harold Pinter to write a play about it. Translate it into Japanese, translate it back into English. Now take about 10 hits of acid and watch the play with a Wesley Willis soundtrack. That would be almost as crazy as Scientology.

9 comments:

Ralph said...

I have to say I really like this post.

However, I do have one question. It might be a very dumb question, but I am no longer afraid to look and sound dumb. I am used to that.

Here's my question:

What's the relevance of the title to the rest of the post?

Thank you.

Michael Grant said...

It's a line that he had in Magnolia.

Thanks for checking in!

Nate Wazoo said...

Imagine the craziest thing you can think of. Got it? Now imagine that you got Harold Pinter to write a play about it. Translate it into Japanese, translate it back into English. Now take about 10 hits of acid and watch the play with a Wesley Willis soundtrack.

Holy crap. That's the best description I've ever read, by a longshot.

emeryroolz said...

I think The Chicken Cow should be the official hymn of the Church of Scientology.

voltairean said...

Why is Scientology so crazy? Just reading up on it today and it sounds no crazier than any religion. In fact, Scientologist appear to believe that it is our responsibility to make the future better since the spirit lives lifetime to lifetime. This philosophy, on its face, is more appealing to me than, say, the rapture. In addition to not wanting to die in a fiery hellstorm, the whole rapture thing tends to put a kabash on all things future like maintaining a green planet. Further, the Scientology creation story about a nefarious intergalactic warlord called Xenu rounding up inhabitants of numerous planets and bringing them to earth is much easier to swallow than Creationism.

All joking aside, it seems to me that the real difference between Scientology and Christianity is in the number or believers. And while there is safety in numbers, it may merely reflect herd mentality rather than any universal truth.

The most bothersome aspect of this new flow of articles on Scientology in light of Tom Cruise's erratic behavior is the lack of scrutiny and questioning by the media of mainstream religion. Important national and world decisions often with life and death consequences are being made based ancient myths. Somehow, a couple of hundred years after the Enlightenment, this is acceptable and goes unquestioned.

But those Scientologist's are NUTS!

Michael Grant said...

Indeed. In fact, you might enjoy my other post about Scientology here.

Hip E. said...

Voltairean:

Yes, Christianity is also pretty crazy. And the main difference is that it's older. Actually, probably the closest corrollary in the world of religion is Mormonism. As described in the great book "Under the Banner of Heaven" by Jon Krakauer, Joseph Smith was a born huckster just like L. Ron Hubbard. It's eery how much they had in common. And many people would say that Mormonism is now a "legitimate religion". As an atheist I'm torn here. Is it more important to point out how ludicrous Scientology is, and say "It's not a real religion"? Or should I focus on the more powerful, but far less popular point that Scientology is EXACTLY like all the "real" religions in many fundamental ways, and thereby point up the absurdity of all religions? I don't know, but it's sure fun to think about.

Voltairean said...

Hip E,

For my 2 cents, when Senators are blaming liberals for pedophile sex scandals in the church and church groups are protesting funerals of dead soldiers because God is punishing us for immoral behavior -- I'd say your time is better spent concentrating on the absurdity of all religions. Not that any amount of reason will Enlighten these people.

Anonymous said...

What church groups are protesting funerals of dead soldiers because God is punishing us for immoral behavior?