Tuesday, April 04, 2006

Don't Let the Door Hit Ya Where The Lord Split Ya

That just seemed like a Texas thing to say. Texas in honor of Tom DeLay leaving Congress. Yeah, not just not running for re-election, but allegedly leaving early and everything. He says it's because the race was too close and he wants to make sure his district goes to a Republican. I bet. I'm sure it has nothing to do with the massive weight of the investigations and indictments.

But actually, I suspect it's something else entirely. As we have learned in the past, golf is rich-old-white-guy crack. No matter how hard they try to stop, they just can't. He couldn't do his one day at a time thing anymore. The withdrawal pains were too strong. And he couldn't afford to take another corruption indictment which would surely follow because the high isn't as sweet if you have to pay for the trip yourself.

Being out of Congress means he can take all the free golf trips he likes. With spring in the air and the flowers in bloom, The Hammer could almost smell the freshly cut Creeping Bentgrass deep from within the halls of Congress. It was the straw that broke the camel's back. Farewell, Tom. I'm sure we'll be hearing much more about you in the days and weeks to come.

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