Fuck You, Pay Me.

Gas is expensive, isn’t it?  It’s above $3.00/gallon.  (When I turned 16, it was $.89/gallon, and I'm not that old!) That makes sense though.  Through no fault of our own, there’s this war in the middle east.  And through no fault of our own, we got kicked in the ass by a couple of bitch hurricanes.  And by ass I mean the areas of the country where they drill for and refine petroleum, which through no fault of our own happen to smell like ass. 
 
So what do we do?  I mean these gas prices are a drain on our economy.  People are spending all their money on gas instead of on like, groceries or blue jeans or iPods, you know?  Luckily, we have a domestic policy genius in the White House.  Bush in his infinite wisdom has asked a sacrifice of us, finally.  He would like it if we could just for the love of God, stop using so much gas. It’s expensive!!
 
Meanwhile, back in the depths of hell, Exxon Mobil has recorded the highest level of profit in the history of capitalism. So I have a question for you, Americans. In a time of crisis, who should pay? The victims of disasters, the citizens of America, and by proxy, the world? Or the oil companies who are recording not just record profits for them, but the highest profits ever recorded? We know how Bush would answer who has a few friends to answer to. But what do you think? Would it be unthinkable for Bush to ask the oil companies to lower their profit margins in the interest of the U.S. economy?

For the record, I don't even have a car. I just, you know, care about America.