Friday, January 21, 2005

Hot Orgies in a Pineapple Under the Sea?

The whack-job conservatives are at it again. The target of their outrage today, you ask? SpongeBob SquarePants.

Now, Dr. Dobson said, SpongeBob's creators had enlisted him in a "pro-homosexual video," in which he appeared alongside children's television colleagues like Barney and Jimmy Neutron, among many others. The makers of the video, he said, planned to mail it to thousands of elementary schools to promote a "tolerance pledge" that includes tolerance for differences of "sexual identity."

It should be noted at this point that according to the video's creator, they didn't mention sexuality at all:

The video's creator, Nile Rodgers, who wrote the disco hit "We Are Family," said Mr. Dobson's objection stemmed from a misunderstanding. Mr. Rodgers said he founded the We Are Family Foundation after the Sept. 11 attacks to create a music video to teach children about multiculturalism. The video has appeared on television networks, and nothing in it or its accompanying materials refers to sexual identity.

You know what Dobson's problem is? Tolerance. To religious nutjobs, tolerance is code for gay. Just like in the sixties, "states' rights" was code for white power. Dr. Dobson wants states' rights and intolerance. In a world without intolerance, who would Dr. Dobson subjugate to gain more money, power, and influence? No worries about that, "doctor," you'll always have the horrible, evil, dirty gays to pick on. Oh - and cartoon characters, too!

The Smurfs had better keep a low profile. All those men and one girl?

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