Why Do You Hate Moms So Much?

I am going to take a step back from writing long-winded diatribes eviscerating the Bush administration for its totally way uncoolness to eviscerate this guy instead.

A man who was denied a red nylon tote bag during a Mother's Day promotion at an Angels baseball game has filed a sex and age discrimination lawsuit against the team.

The class action claim filed by Michael Cohn, a Los Angeles psychologist, alleges that thousands of males and fans under age 18 are entitled to $4,000 in damages each because they were treated unequally at last May's promotion. Women over 18 received the gifts.

So you are suing in court because you didn't get some pink flowery momish tote bag with a credit card logo on it, you big pussy? What, was your purse not big enough to carry all your tampons?

So this happened:

This weekend's Mother's Day promotion will offer tote bags to the first 25,000 fans over age 18, rather than cater specifically to women. Mead would not say whether the change was in response to Cohn's complaint.

Rava [Cohn's attorney] said the altered promotion still violates the civil rights of fans under age 18.

It reminds me of something my own mother used to say to me when I was a kid going shopping for Mother's or Father's Day complaining it isn't fair that there isn't a Children's Day – "Every day is Children's Day." How many bats, bobble heads, novelty foam hands, and miniature baseballs do they give out only to children under 18 or 12 or whatever? Do I complain about my civil rights or do I think that as much as I loathe children, it's cool to give them some free garbage at a baseball game every once in a while? Is it really so bad to give out gifts to women on Mother's Day?

Hey Cohn, I didn't hear your mom complaining about the gift I gave her last night.